Friday, 1 August
The State of Washington Voters' Pamphlet for the August 18, 2008 Primary arrived in our mailbox yesterday. I started to browse in its pages and found out that a little information about the candidates is a scary thing. For example:
One Congressional candidate lists as his family: "The life of Spaceship Earth is his family."
Another opens his Candidate Statement with: "I rise to defend the moon and stars, the air we breathe, the oceans and the rivers, the plants, and all living things upon this our Mother Earth...and you...and your children...and your sacred poem...before the salmon die, before the birds stop singing; before the bees forget how to fly." (Those are his dot-dot-dots, not places where I've dropped stuff.)
Moving along to candidates for governor, we find one whose Candidate Statement says: "Because I feel Washington State should be leading the Nation in promoting a Spiritual Civilization based on holistic medicine, alternative energy, affordable housing, relevant education, a dynamic economy, bio-diversity, world development and meaningful access to justice, I respectfully propose my 'FUNDAMENTAL FREEDOMS' PLAN OF ACTION."
Another gubernatorial candidate lists his occupation/employer as "retired." [Has nothing to do with his time, so he's running for office?]
Another lists websites of interest and includes Aljazeera. [Yeah, maybe it's an interesting site, but given what else he says in his profile, this is just plain scary.]
Still another lists 1 cat and 1 dog as part of his family. [I'm all for dogs and cats, but I'm not sure I'd list 'em in a space where most people list children or deceased spouses.]
Then we move on to lieutenant governor and the people--or at least the statements--seem closer to "normal." I might conclude that the higher the office, the weirder the weirdos, except that one of the candidates for state representative opens his Candidate Statement with (the caps are his): "I INTEND TO EMPOWER PEOPLE TO SOLVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS." He goes on to list two reasons he's running for office, one of which is "to promote my campaign theme of 'Compassion for a Republican.'"
I guess the bottom line here is if you want some scary entertainment, you need look no farther than government-published material in your mailbox. I know I won't be answering the phone until after the primary.
1 comment:
While not nearly as humorous, I find that the King County Board of Elections is also a little scary. I have received at least 2 notices telling me that election mail has been returned and that I've been defaulted to inactive status. At the same time, I've received all of my ballots, including the one for this primary that came only a week after the most recent returned mail notice. And I'm fairly certain that I once received 2 absentee ballots for the same election when I was still physically in Seattle.
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